Helicopter spouse

From my work in higher ed, I’ve gotten some first-hand experience with “helicopter parents” — well-meaning moms and dads who register their kids for classes, badger professors when their kids get bad grades…even move in with their precious kiddos to make sure they have a good college experience. This week, my sweet wife became a helicopter spouse.

Last week in my Products Liability class I got grilled for an hour and a half. The questioning started innocently enough, but when my professor recognized I didn’t read the assignment as well as I should have, he pounced. By the end of the class, I was dazed, confused and didn’t have a clue. I was upset and mad at myself for not doing well, and I told Chel about it that night.

So this Tuesday before I made my meek return to that class, Chel emailed me a link to the website of my professor’s law firm. “He looks like a nice guy, and he’s a Horned Frog too!” was the gist of it. I didn’t think too much of it, but I sure as heck did my reading for the week and was ready to talk about any of the assigned cases. (Although I certainly wasn’t going to volunteer!)

Class came and went and he didn’t really call on anybody, and that night Chel and I started talking about class and the professor.

“So he is a nice guy, your professor, right?” Chel asked.

“Oh yeah, he seems very nice,” I said — and then it hit me. I knew Chel wouldn’t have gone to the trouble of finding my prof’s website unless she was also looking for his email address. And she wouldn’t have looked for his email address unless she was going to email him! “So what did you say in your email to him?”

Alas, she did email him. To not one but two of his email addresses. And it went something like this: (paraphrased for dramatic effect)

FROM: Chelsea
TO: Professor
SUBJECT: A tremendous thank you!

Dear Bobby, I know we’ve never met, but we have a mutual friend. His name is Ben Alexander and he’s in your class at SMU.

You see, Ben Alexander is also my husband. He told me he got grilled in your class last week, and I want to thank you. He just finished his first year and made the dean’s list, but I think no professor has pushed Ben like you did last week. Thank you! I know that professors like you are going to help him achieve all his goals.

I hope I have the pleasure of meeting you. Oh, and please don’t let Ben know that I sent you this email.

Thank you!
Chelsea

I know she felt bad about emailing him — she was worried that if he was a jerk he might have read the email to the class, causing even more embarrassment. That afternoon she told Little Mom what she had done, and asked her to say a little prayer that the prof was nice about it.

“No, I’m gonna pray that it comes back undeliverable!” Little Mom said.

It wasn’t that bad of a message, and I wasn’t mad about it at all. In fact, we laughed a lot about the whole deal. But I think my love has learned a lesson that she will carry with her in her future role as a mother. She will continue to be supportive and encouraging of my schooling and our kids’ education. But after this one email, the helicopter has landed!