Jaminfrog

Hi there! It’s me — your son/brother/spouse/friend/co-worker/acquaintance who hasn’t written in a while. So to make up for it, here’s everything I really intended to tell you about for the past month, but didn’t, in an easier-to-read condensed version. It’s like those old school Reader’s Digest Condensed Books, but of my life.

I was an American Airlines statistic last week when I was supposed to fly to DC for an SMU alumni event, but the five flights I tried to get on to make it there in time all got canceled because of their impromptu safety inspections. You always see those shots on TV of people in airports laying on cots or standing in long lines. Lucky for me there was no laying on cots involved, but I did stand in a lot of lines. Some other SMU folks got stranded in DC for an extra day and had to put up with a day of sightseeing and staying at the Ritz-Carlton. The horror!

We’re moving into a new building at work in the next month or two, and I am obsessed with the fact that I will have an office. With a door. Not that I will close the door ever, but still! We’ve decided that now is the time for me to get rid of my Despair.com demotivational poster in my current cubicle and create a Grown Up Office. Chel was kind enough to give me a painting of a horned frog to serve as the centerpiece. Add to that a water wall (or maybe just a little desk-sized water fountain) and the theme will be Contemporary Zen Mascots. Now I just need to find a good painting of a mustang to ensure equal representation.

I officially became an Apple Fanboy after I had a slight problem with my iPhone where a little swath of pixels on the screen was dimmer than the rest. I took it to my friendly neighborhood Apple store, and one of their “Geniuses” (isn’t that a better name than “Technical Support Person”?) agreed that I needed a replacement phone. So he gave me one, for free. I suppose I should be annoyed that my first phone weirded out, but instead I’m just amazed at Apple’s great customer service.

We still haven’t resolved the automobile situation following Chelsea’s accident. We asked GM to take a look at the car because we were concerned the accident was caused by the rear differential locking up. They finally sent an inspector out, and we’re waiting for the final report from Detroit. We just want to make sure the car is safe before we sell it, and alert GM if they’re doing something wrong in their recall service. For now we’re carpooling it to work, which is actually nice because Chel and I get to spend Commute Time together.

We’re going back to Padre over Memorial Day Weekend! This time, instead of pulling an all-nighter to drive the 13 hours from Dallas, we’re going to fly. I’m really looking forward to some beach bumming after finals are over and before work gets really crazy this summer.

And speaking of finals…I’m really not looking forward to them this semester. I’ve got some major catching-up to do over the next couple of weeks so I can be prepared. I wish Reader’s Digest made Condensed Books of all the cases I still need to read.

So this is what I would have written about over the past month. What’s up with you, my friendly reader?

You may remember the story about the time I got grilled for two hours in a class last semester, and then Chelsea found the professor’s email address and sent him an appreciative yet embarrassing note about how much of a growth opportunity that whole experience was for me.

Well, I figured that class would be my lowest grade of the semester, and given my track record last semester, that would have been pretty low. So I got the grade back on Friday, and I couldn’t believe it.

I made a freaking A. Which happens instead to be the highest grade I’ve made in law school. (The other A’s I’ve made have had “minuses” appended to them.)

Chel keeps telling me that I’d make higher grades if I talked to my professors more. But heck, I’ve got a better plan. I’m just going to give her their email addresses!

Last night I found out that I’ve earned my lowest grade ever — a C+ in Real Estate Transactions.

On the one hand, it encourages me to try harder this semester, because last fall I really didn’t study too hard until the bitter end. On the other hand, I don’t feel too bad, because the exam was based primarily on something we spent about five minutes discussing in one class.

And the guys at work reminded me that it could always be worse; I could have failed and had to take the class over again!

It makes me think back to the story about a Chinese farmer that the dean of students (who happened to also teach this class) told us when we started law school. So I got a C+. Good news. Bad news. Who’s to say?

Happy new year, loyal readers. (Er, family!)

Since today is the first day most folks are back in the office after SMU was closed for a week, it’s a day for catching up on how the holidays went for everybody. One of my co-workers was asking about how I did on finals, and I told her I am refusing to hazard a guess on how I did, because no matter the guess, I will be wrong.

Since classes start next Thursday and I probably won’t get my grades for another month or so, she commented that it must be a special kind of hell to have to return to class without knowing how I did last semester.

Much to the contrary, I said. For the next three weeks I can live in the ignorance of not knowing how I did, assuming I did fine on everything until I’m informed otherwise. Plus, the next round of finals is a whole four months away. So the time before grades come out is truly the most wonderful time of the year!

I’m glad finals are over tonight. These tests have turned me into a real Scrooge!

I got some interesting tax advice from a fifth grader a few weeks back.

We had just completed a lesson about taxation without representation, in an activity where the kiddos were unfairly taxed pieces of candy based on silly things like what color shirt they wore that day. The lesson was intended to show why the colonists broke away from the British government and how unfair the British taxes were.

So when we asked the kids what they learned that day, a student (wise beyond his years?) replied:

“You should hide your money and your candy from the government!”

Now, no telling whether he had learned that concept from his parents…and we tried to steer him away from a life of tax evasion…but my recent experiences with tuition benefits suggest to me that the little man might be on to something.

An IRS rule states that any graduate tuition benefit over $5,250 in value per year that would qualify one for a new profession is taxable at the same rate as regular income. So, since SMU is generous enough to pay my tuition, I am taxed as though I receive about $17,000 additional income in the bank that I never actually see. SMU calculates up the taxes and deducts them from my paycheck over three pay periods each semester.

What that amounts to this semester is that in November, December and January, I take home about $1,000 less than I would in a normal month. Now, that may not seem like a big deal, but Addy needs her sweaters, after all.

I know I shouldn’t be complaining, since 95 percent of my fellow students are making far greater personal and financial sacrifices to make it through school. But something about this IRS rule seems screwy. Shouldn’t the government be encouraging people to take advantage of these benefits rather than taxing them for it? Isn’t the allowance of $5,250 a little unreasonable for those using these benefits at a private (more expensive) school like SMU? If they have to tax something, maybe the allowance should be a percentage of tuition rather than a flat rate.

Plus, it seems like the IRS is trying to have it both ways. I can’t claim the amount of tuition benefit as an educational expense on my tax return because one can only claim a credit on tuition paid out of one’s personal funds. But then they tax the tuition benefit as if it has been paid as part of my salary.

So it seems I can’t hide my money, my candy or my tuition benefit from the government. But I’d sure like to be in a position to help change this rule one day.

A friend sent me this story about a law professor who spices up his classes by doing covers of famous songs with legally-themed lyrics. (Like a Brittney Spears-inspired ditty called “You’re Not That Innocent” or “Breach It” to the tune of a Michael Jackson hit.) This hasn’t caught on at SMU yet, but here’s hoping.

I’ve volunteered to teach a fifth grade class at a Dallas elementary school for an hour a week as part of the Law Related Education program at school. Through next spring, we’ll cover topics like the Bill of Rights, voting, the trial process, and other fun stuff. At the end of our time we get to bring the class to campus to participate in a mock trial. It’s been a blast so far!

Today was my day to teach again, and I pulled up to the school 10 minutes before the appointed time. The school was a ghost town — what had been all hustle and bustle the week before was empty streets and tumbleweeds. Then I saw the school marquee and realized what today was.

It was Fair Day! Yes, the time-honored tradition when Dallas school kids get to descend upon the State Fair of Texas to ride rides, pet livestock and eat fried food.

So I didn’t get to teach today, but I think Chel and I are convinced that we are taking Little Mom to the fair tomorrow! I’m a little worried since it’s Texas-OU weekend, but we’re going to try to time it so that we’re riding rides while the other 80,000 people are in the stadium. We got a State Fair season pass that also entitles us to go to Holiday in the Park at Six Flags and to a free movie. What a deal!

Now if only I can gird my stomach to prepare for fried cookie dough, fried twinkies, fried Coke, fried Oreos, funnel cakes and corny dogs. Tomorrow is family Fair Day!

From my work in higher ed, I’ve gotten some first-hand experience with “helicopter parents” — well-meaning moms and dads who register their kids for classes, badger professors when their kids get bad grades…even move in with their precious kiddos to make sure they have a good college experience. This week, my sweet wife became a helicopter spouse. Continue Reading »

Some random observations on where I’ve been for more than a month…

Law school is back in session and I really like all my classes. At the last minute I dropped the Income Tax class I signed up for last spring and got the last open seat in Real Estate Transactions. I’ve heard from the folks in Income Tax that their class is all about accounting and formulas, so I’m glad I’ve postponed that experience for a while. (Hey, I was an ad-pr major, remember! I don’t do math.)

Work has been pretty busy and we’ve finished two big projects and a bunch of other little ones. SMU is in the quiet phase of a capital fundraising campaign that will officially kick off next year some time, and there’s no better way to be “quiet” about something than to build a big website with video, charts and graphs…so we did! That site was about a year in the making, but we ended up building most of it the day or two before it launched.  I’m proud we pulled it all together somehow. We also launched an online version of our alumni magazine, so if you ever want to read good stories about SMU, head over that way.

I learned the location of a school zone in our neighborhood last week when I got a speeding ticket. I had just dropped off some movies at our local Blockbuster when I turned from the side road onto Davis Street and merrily began driving away. Then I spotted the cop, who was simultaneously spotting me in a black convertible, going 38 in a 20. The big flashing school zone sign was about a block back the road before where I turned. Luckily there were no kids endangered, just a friendly Dallas County Constable with a radar gun who also observed that I have neglected to change my address on my license. $454 later, I have learned my lesson. I will never go back to that Blockbuster in the morning!

Other than that, I’ve just done a lot of reading for school, a lot of hanging out, a little traveling, and a lot of not posting anything to this site. I’ve got more stories to tell, so I’m picking up the whole blogging thing and will be back around here more frequently. Off to work now — but on the lookout for school zones.